Author Q&A With Guryan Tighe

Guryan Tighe is an experienced leadership coach, workshop facilitator, and communications strategist whose clients describe her as a “Fear Technician.” She is the founder of FOURAGE, built on the belief that understanding and working with our fears, rather than trying to conquer them, yields more professional success and personal fulfillment. She is also the author of Unmasking Fear: How Fears Are Our Gateways to Freedom.

You are an author, but is it your day job? If not, what fills your days? It’s actually not. I am a coach, speaker, and leadership facilitator. It’s actually my day job that led me to become an author.

Did you always want to be an author? I never considered myself a writer. In fact, when I first wanted to share my findings about fear with the world, I made other attempts. I initially tried a podcast with a thought partner of mine – without realizing how complex that world is to navigate. Then I co-created a training program with a police officer to help police officers metabolize their fears in healthier ways. Unfortunately, while many administrators wanted to incorporate it into their training curriculum, it was challenging to gain the receptivity of many departments. So, I turned to writing after a couple of attempts in other forms. What I knew was that it felt essential to share my learnings about fear with the world. What I wasn’t attached to was the format… but it ended up being a book.

What is your most recent book, and what inspired you to write it? It’s called Unmasking Fear: How Fears Are Our Gateways to Freedom. I have been coaching individuals on overcoming their fears for nine years. And I have discovered that fear is wonderful – when understood. We fear ‘fear,’ so we have avoided it – which has allowed it to influence our decisions. After talking to people day after day, I discovered how much information fear holds for us – that it’s our greatest teacher, if we can begin to turn towards it and understand how it serves our growth. Selfishly, I wanted to improve my relationship with fear – to ensure I was making intentional choices that supported the life I wanted. I was inspired to share this with the world, as fear seems to be rampant right now – and if people understood it more, I think their connection with themselves and with each other could look a lot more peaceful.

How do you hope your book uplifts those who read it? When we’re in fear – we can give our power away… to constructs that don’t actually appeal to us, to groupthink, to panic. When we understand our fear, we can be empowered to make conscious choices. We can learn who we really are, why we’re here, and then hold others in their beingness. I hope this becomes a tool in people’s toolboxes to access more intentional living, inner peace, and contentment.

What are you most excited about with this book? That a possible output is that fear isn’t so scary? That, while ironic, is actually in service of our growth! I love having conversations that challenge the norm – I hope that this does just that – and maybe even begins to lead us back towards each other (on a collective level).

What advice would you give someone wanting to succeed in your professional industry? If there were one way to lead, there would be one management book. There isn’t. There are thousands. Two things that I have loved discovering are:

When you are who you truly are, your path reveals itself to you.
When you lead from a place of authenticity – knowing your values and embodying them – inspired leadership can move mountains. Modeling is the greatest form of leadership. Be who you are.

How do you handle setbacks and criticism? I see myself as a lifelong learner. I don’t believe in failure (rejection) — I think in redirection. If I hadn’t failed at that podcast or police training program, I may never have written a book. It’s not always easy to receive feedback; however, I try to look at it through a growth mindset – to see how I can become the next best version of myself. And when it stings to receive, it probably means I have something to look at.

Being an author today is like running a business. How do you manage your publicity and social media and maintain engagement with readers? Great question. It’s challenging – especially because I don’t love the unintended consequences of social media on people, of which there are many. I try to be selective about how I engage (I ensure I’m authentic), I won’t engage in things that aren’t in integrity with who I am and what I’m in service to. And I try not to worry too much about what everyone thinks. My work will resonate with some and not others. Though it’s undoubtedly an absolute gift when I get to see that someone I’ve never met has derived some value from my offering. I try to find balance in it all.

How do you hold yourself accountable and achieve the goals that you set forth? I have a high level of self-motivation. For me, this work is my passion, so accountability actually feels like lifeforce. When you get to do what you love, it doesn’t feel like work. Sometimes I do have to dig deep – but my passion enlivens me along the way. And I love to-do lists.

How do you structure your day and make time for writing? I write best in 2–3-hour blocks. When I’m in a writing-heavy time, I will block these windows out. I also find weekends to be more productive for me, as there’s less noise, and writing isn’t my day job.

What do you find most fulfilling in the career that you’ve chosen? The richness of conversations I get to be in all day long. I get to go to the messy places with people because fear can be messy.

“Where there is light, there must be shadow, and where there is shadow, there must be light. There is no shadow without light and no light without shadow.” – Haruki Murakami.

I get to dance in this intersection of shadow and light – the ultimate gift.

What book uplifts you? Too many to list – but here’s a snapshot…

The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows, John Koenig
You Can Heal Your Life, Louise Hay
The Creative Act, Rick Rubin
The Hero with a Thousand Faces, Joseph Campbell
Into the Magic Shop, James Doty. MD

Anything else you’d like to share with your readers? I know it can be scary to even think about fear, let alone start to explore it. And, honestly, I think nothing has more information for us… Nothing can lead us to our true happiness more than our fear of it. So, I invite you to get curious.

You can learn more about Guryan Tighe and grab your copy of her book through her website.